Forgive mai fobinesss
Hey hey~....haven posted in a lonnnggg time. I can't post anythin unless i have somethin interesting to talk about. So i decided to write about mai trip to camp barnabas~! Camp barnabas is a mission trip to serve these physically disabled kids for a week and be able to give it all to them. It's the week that you must throw your selfishness away and learn to sacrifice for others.
So...a couple of weeks before the trip, our team leader Jeannie tells us that we have meetings a couple of times to train and get ready for the mission. When i signed up for this mission, i had no idea what it was and what i was expected to do for the whole week. Then i hit reality during the training days when we had to get in groups, and evaluate skits by acting them out. These skits were real life situations that kids from the previous year had to deal with. No one came up with a sensable solution to any of the skits and i started to get scared spiriutally and mentally.
The physically disabled kids are referred as campers as the helpers are called the counslers. Each counsler were to be assigned a camper. The level of difficulty depended on the camper you got. Many of the campers were paralyzed, and needed diaper change, showering, brushing teeth, feeding. In the other hand, some campers were able to walk, wash themselves, feed themselves, and go to the restroom themselves.
Not knowing the kind of camper that i would get, i hoped in my mind that i would get a easy camper, cause i honestly didn't have the guts to give someone a shower(awkwardness), or take them to the restroom or wipe them.
The day came when we arrived at Camp Barnabs and we trained there for another full day to prepare the arrivals of the campers. I got so stressed out over the responsibilty that i had to take. Many others were also in the same position. The next day, the campers arrived one by one in a car and were to be greeted by there personal counsler who was going to take care of them. I was waiting for my camper nervously when i noticed that a girl wouldn't or refused to get out of her car. Since i had already seen the picture of mai camper, i immediately noticed it was her and ran next to the car to greet her.
Many of you might already know but i have problems in showing affection for other people and i have a hard time expressing myself.. I wondered in the beginning if i would be able to give my camper the support and love that she needs. She was crying sadly at the back of her car and all of the sudden something amazing happened. I bent down to her and told her that everything was going to be ok. And i felt a sudden urge to protect her from everything and i promised myself that i would do anything for her from that moment and on.
Her name was Kristin, a typical 12 year old girl who was diagnosed with CP at the age of 1. Being a premature child, she was nolonger able to use her legs and i also noticed that she wasn fully capable of using her hands either. Not being able to fully grasp anything she was very impacient at times and also depressed. However her spirtit was more lively than anyone i'd seen. Even though she was depressed at times, i knew that she was the girl who cared more about her family then herself. The most amazing thing is, the beautiful voice she had, and her capabilty to sing so well.
The camp was one of the most challenging things i had to go through. I had to give her showers and help her to the restroom, brush her teeth and wash her face. None of us thought it awkward to do these things and i still can't explain why.
Some of the kids at camp i thought were metally disabled because they were not able to express themselves in words or in any other ways we use to communicate with ourselves. When you see one drool, or make wierd gestures and noises with eyes rolling all over the place, you automatically assume they'll never understand, or already categorize them different from normal. I always thought this way until i saw one of these kids laughing at his counsler's unusual movements. The counsler had figured out to make the kid laugh. How can one who does not understand laugh at the very things that we laugh at. I knew that he was mentally there, and somehow felt that he knew more than all of us, what everything truelly means. You'll never understand how it feels to see the smile on their faces. You'll do anything to make them laugh, and as counslers, we all felt this way.
I could go on and on about the things i realized at this camp. But one thing that i want to point out was how lively they were and how little they complained about things. You may think that your life is terrible and devastating but compared to most of the people in the world, you should be thankful of what you have. Because of their disabilities, their own families are always in dispute and are also torn apart. We can never understand the world they live in and we will never be able to even imagine the slightest pain that they must go throughout their entire life.
Don't get me wrong, i knwo that i complain a lot about my life, and i hate it at times. But remember these kids, which i believe that their purpose was to help us realize these things.
This is Jordon and her camper is to her left
My camper is in the fronte!
On left: the one who helped me realize with his smile
On right: mai favorite camper Patrick
cute eh?
Also mai favorite
Her name is Amber, she makes awsome horse noises
Our whole cabin before the dance
swimming time
FOB= resting time
cabin buddies
our WONDERFUL counslers/cia
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